A Parody of Jonathan Swift's A Modest Proposal
by BloodyCrimson431
Summary: A parody of an essay wrote about eating children to solve hunger issues. Though it is on a different subject matter but is generally the same style.


A Parody of Jonathan Swift's _A Modest Proposal_

Society claims that child abuse is detrimental to the child's psyche and wellbeing. But is it really? Child abuse is defined as the physical, sexual, or emotional mistreatment or neglect of a child. I believe that child abuse only strengthens the children, and prepares them for the real world. What doesn't kill me only makes me stronger, as the saying goes.

I attended a Christian Academy until the tenth grade. While attending that thrice accursed school, for the majority of my life, I began to hate all things Christian, and all things society deemed as "good" or "proper." In the academy, the teachers and officials held all things they and society thought of as "bad" or "evil" right in front of our eyes, but just out of our reach. I and one other found anything beyond our reach, and whatever was thought of as bad, as fascinating.

In tenth grade I started attending public school, where all things originally thought as unattainable, suddenly became within my reach. And so began the downwards spiral into my success. All that I am today is all due to the abuse I received as a child, including the bullying, my peers suffered unto me.

Child abuse is just a juxtaposition of events that, in the end, helps children all over the world. By learning to bear the pain, children are learning lifelong lessons. Such as never trust anyone fully, other than yourself, grin and bear it, and how to live without thinking much of abuse. I learnt this lesson the hard way. At a young age, my next door neighbour sexually abused me many times before my parents noticed what was happening. My naivety died then, and has stayed dead. My eyes were finally opened to the reality of the world, and I overcame my failings, I was no longer an insufferable weakling in the world. In a way, I am grateful to the neighbour whom, in my childhood, abused me. If not for my neighbour, I would not be the person I am today, rich and successful.

The aforementioned lessons are important, and ones I have taken to heart. Only a select few of my closest friends, of the few friends I have, know all that there is to know about me, and I trust them to keep quiet about my secrets, and to not sell them to the highest bidder. This is another lesson which children who are abused learn. They learn whom to trust and whom not to trust. It is a harsh lesson, which usually is filled with mistakes, but after it all is said and done, the child learns, and adapts.

Children who are mistreated learn at an early age that the world is not all sunshine, and rainbows, since children whom don't grow up being abused rarely learn this lesson until much later in their life. This will make those children overly naïve, and unknowing of the true harshness of the real world. Being maltreated as a child only strengthens children, and teaches them to be able to block off their own emotions from the outside world. Having the ability to remove oneself from an event is imperative for people to survive in the modern world. This ability, or strength, is also very important if one wanted to pursue a career in law enforcement, or even the military. Being abused would help the children in their future endeavors, as evident in persons whom become Crime Scene Investigators.

Being abused frees children from weakness, and makes them more mature than the other children. Being more mature, the children can learn easier and quicker, and to be less of a bother to the rest of the world. Being abused increases a child's learning skills, and heightens their intelligence. Don't all parents want their children to be smart, so that they may live a successful life? I know that, I, for one, would – if I ever had children that lived past the fetus stage – want my child to succeed in their academic studies and be successful in life, like I am currently. I would not wish being an onerous weakling on anyone, especially not my own child. Having a weak, insignificant child would be a kick in the face, and to say the least, shameful. I would never subject my child to that future, as I would only want the best for my child. If I ever had a child I would condition him for the real world, as soon as he is old enough and able to learn and understand the teachings that I would proffer unto him.


End file.
